Shuffling to the Savior

I'm in a hard place right now; a place I was not expecting to be, but nevertheless, here I am. The desire of my heart is to glorify God and honor him with my words and actions through this time. My flesh, on the other hand, would like to crawl into a pit of despair and wallow in self-pity and misery and to justify it.

Have you ever been in that place? You know what is right and good, but what is easier and will feel good (atleast in the short term) is to just let loose and say, "Who cares"? Well, that's right where I am at this very moment, and it's a good place to be.

You might wonder how I could say such a thing. You see, I know something; something fantastic. When I say,"Who cares", I know that God cares. He cares not only about my sin, but he cares also about my struggle with it. God is pleased with my struggle, which is why he allows times like this into my life. He cares about my pain and my suffering. He suffers with me, not because he can't stop the pain, but because he knows the pain is necessary for my growth to be more like Christ. He uses these times to mold me into who I was created to be. Knowing this doesn't stop the pain, but it gives me hope. It is in that hope I will cling to, knowing that these "momentary trials" will produce something that has worth and meaning not just here and now, but for all eternity. I may sound strong in my words. I may even have brief times of feeling strong, but this strength is not my own. It comes from the One who "holds all things together." Right now, I am running to my Savior, but tomorrow I may be shuffling. This is not what matters, though. If I do not have the strength to run, it is because he has given me enough strength to shuffle.